Competition is good, no?

3M recently decided to revert to good old landline (MTNL types) because the Reliance signal was weak in his area… so off he went to the local telephone exchange expecting long queues and arrogant staff. Much to his astonishment, there was very little crowd… and the person at the desk apologised as he was in the toilet when I came there! Is this the same MTNL where you had to plead and beg for a phone connection? Well… competition changes every thing!

Till now a certain Sena assumed that Marathi Manoos was a ‘captive voter’… until the other Sena whisked away half the votes! Now the Original Sena is trying out a gamut of tricks to woo back its voters… from making Sena Bhavan high tech and responsive… to organising a ‘Long March’ to the MHADA office. But will the Marathi Manoos come back? Let’s wait for the assembly elections!

The Elusive Sealink

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Yesterday, MMW prodded a very very lazy 3M for a visit to the Lucknowi Chikkan Exhibition by SEWA at Nariman Point… With all the Bandra-Worli Sealink (Should it not be Wandre-Warali Setu for Thackerays?) talk, 3M decided to go to Nariman Point via Bandra… mind you he stays @ Wadala! Lo and behold… half of Mumbai wanted to see the Sealink on the last ‘free day’! After an hour and half, we could only reach Kalanagar… So we took an U-turn… No SEWA… No Sealink! Just had some coffee @ Matunga on the way back!

घारापुरीची शिरा पुरी!

3M’s Voting Experience

We have recently shifted our residence to a “fully loaded residential complex” in the island city to beat the commuting from the suburbs. Coming from a family of ardent voters who never miss any election, my father had ensured that our names are transferred to the local list so that we “exercise our right”. But much to my chagrin, none of the political parties cared to give us the “voter’s slip” that tells us the location of our voting booth. Probably, they think that “Tower Dwellers” don’t vote…

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Luckily, I came across the website of the Chief Electoral Officer (Maharashtra) which claimed that it could help me locate the booth. After an hour of weak connection, I was able to find out that this elusive booth is in “Mandap K Tata Blek Kr 1 V 2 chya Moklya Maidanat”… WTF… was this some coded message?… or was it some grand plan to deny us the coveted black dot????

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Luckily, a local NGO had put up a poster on the society notice board that the booth was in a local municipal Urdu school… so out went the 3M family to locate that “temple of democracy”… The school was teeming with voters of all sorts… but not a single political worker of any party was present there to help you locate the booth (How I miss good old Vile Parle!). After 15 minutes of search, we realized that our “complex” is not in the list… omigosh… they deleted the whole complex from the list! Conspiracy… Conspiracy… After a few phone calls to our neighbours, we realized that the locality has another Urdu school… half a kilometer way… YES… we have found our Shangri-La!

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No indication at the entrance of the school that a tiny part of the “world’s biggest elections” is taking place inside. EC was kind enough to dedicate an entire classroom for our complex… which was deserted except for the bored government staff. After the customary identification and signature, 3M got his chance to decide who will “take his voice to the corridors of power in Delhi”… As per tradition, I placed my index finger on the desk and that seemingly tipsy guy put a black stroke (not the dot) on it. Off I went with puffed chest to do my duty, by pressing that prized button… ‘peeeeeeeeeeeeeee’ screamed the Banshee inside the voting machine and locked my vote for ever!

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Only in the evening (when I saw the celebrities brandishing their middle fingers) did I realize that all Mumbaikars (voting types) have the black stroke on the middle finger… Hope I am not on the wrong side of law!

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Diwali Ank – a glorious tradition

The Marathi tradition of releasing special magazines for Diwali (called Diwali Ank) is completing 100 years. Most Marathi families will buy at least one copy of the 400+ odd publications that hit the stand. You have "Pooja Issues" in Bengal and "Onam Specials" in Kerala... But nothing matches the width and depth of the Diwali Anks

Keeping this tradition alive is my mother who buys a few of these magazines every year. This year my father decided to surprise her by buying her a dozen of the best ones… So here is 3M’s father's experience of buying them from a typical Marathi dukaan. What better place to buy these magazines than Girgaon, the epicenter of Marathi culture in Mumbai. The obvious choice being a bookstore called M/s B D Bagwe & Co.

In the days of “Crossword” and “Landmark”, this trip was a re-exposure to the “old world charm” of traditional retailing. When dad enquired about the different Anks, he was curtly told that he will have to buy the list for 1 Rupee. Once the princely sum was handed over, a four-fold, two-colour list was handed over. The prices of the Anks varied from Rs. 10/- to Rs. 250/-. After shortlisting the 12 issues, he realized that half the prices did not match with those on the list! No concessions given… No person to pack the Anks in old newspaper… No plastic bags to carry the Anks home… They refused to deliver the Anks till the cab even though my father is a senior citizen! But the Dukaandar’s parting shot took the cake – “Which circulating library are you buying these mags for?”.

Welcome to the world of “Marathi Retailing”! For all those who do not want to undergo a similar grid can opt for the online option in dollar!

Diwali Ank recommendations by the other 3M (Middleclass Marathi Mom) strictly in alphabetical order:

• Akshar
• Kalanirnay
• Lokmat
• Loksatta
• Maharashtra Times
• Mauj